I saw this quote from Alan Greenspan and it made me smirk:

Don’t use Fed as a ‘magical piggy bank’

He’s referring to the recent Federal spending splurge, bailouts, tax payer refunds, the housing bill… the list goes on. That giant sucking sound Ross Perot used to talk about is actually a giant crane sound lifting dollar bills off the money printing machine.

So, I looked for a suitable picture to represent the magical piggy bank – what would it look like? How fast does it spit out $100 bills I wonder. Do you have to press a button or is it running non stop? I wonder if there is a warranty on the motors. At the rate they’re spending money, you’d think you’d have to change the oil fast and what if they miss what happens. So… anyways, I wasn’t able to find a lot of pictures of piggy banks but here are some pictures of pigs I found. Suits the whole premise if you ask me.

This one can deliver cash to any government agency needing a quick ten billion:

photo credit: zappowbang

This one is a bit slow. However it can deliver up to $400 billion to the Presidents desk at a moments notice:

photo credit: zappowbang

This one is the stealth fighter version. It travels to the problem and regardless of the optimal solution spits out dollar bills (in $500 billion increments) until the problem is completely buried in cash. Then moves on to the next one. It also has the ability to come back to the original problem should it resurface. It then throws more money at it and re-buries it. The Chinese love this one – it keeps their reserves high.

photo credit: zappowbang

What’s this doing here? This is my piggy bank after paying taxes:

photo credit: ken +

Finally, this is the magical piggy bank Greenspan is talking about. It doesn’t listen to any taxpayer, only responds to signals by the President or Congress – both need not be present. It does special missions like bailing out companies, keeping social security solvent and stands ready to spill its guts out if Fannie and Freddie need cash.

photo credit: zappowbang

If you see any other suitable pictures of the magical piggy bank – do send them my way. I’d be curious to see what it looks like.

Related posts brought to you by Yet Another Related Posts Plugin.